About Artsie_ladie

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About Artsieladie

Just some boring reading.

Greetings everyone!

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This page is under construction, more like a complete over haul!

I am not a person that really likes to talk all that much about myself. As far as I'm concerned they are simply boring details. I much

prefer to let my creativity and my contributions speak for me, including my perceptions and philosophies. Sometimes, however, it can be a

good thing to let others know a little about us, what we think, how we think, and so on and so forth. This web-page is meant to be for the

most part, a page about yours truly with some of my thoughts, opinions, and perspectives thrown in. I do not expect agreement or dis-

agreement. My thoughts and my opinions are mine and mine alone of which I have every right to them, just as everyone else has the right

to their opinions. I am warning all readers of this page, however. I am a writer and because I am, I write quite extensively.

I am a very private person and so, I resent "big time" someone intruding into what I "choose" to keep private. If "I" decide to divulge

something about myself, this is "my" choice to make, not anyone else's. Because I am a private person, I also try to respect the privacy

of others. We each have the right to our privacy and anyone whom invades the privacy of another for whatever the reason, is disrespectful

and displays the lack of moral and ethical values. We each have the right to divulge about ourselves that which "we choose" to divulge. If a

person invades the privacy of another, that person deserves to have the same done onto them. If this same person then distributes and

shares the information retrieved through the "invasion of another's privacy", both the invader AND those "accepting" of it, are at fault.

I do not like being in the spotlight nor to be in front of a camera. I'd much rather be behind the camera, taking photos and I prefer

working in the background. I do not expect to be praised for every little thing I do, but by the same token, I do not expect to have what I do

and have done to be totally unmentioned or the credit for, begrudged me, either, especially when others are being credited for far less or for

work that is really mine.

I can't accept a compliment graciously to save my life, but this doesn't mean I don't like being the recipient of them. A simple "thank

you" never seems to be quite adequate as a response, even though I am very grateful to be given them.

First and foremost, I am a Christian. I love my God! By no means do I expect all people to be nor do I interact with "just Christians",

only however, for I try to respect everyone's faiths and beliefs, or lack there of, cultures and customs, and as well, their sexual orientation.

It is our diversity that gives life flavor and we all have been given "free will". It is not my job to judge. Therefore, I try to leave this in the most

capable hands of the Lord.

I am so blessed! I was raised and loved by the very best mother anyone could ever hope for. Although my dear Mom is with the Lord now,

I know she is in a much better place and a place she has more than earned. But my missing her tremendously, will never cease until the

day I join her in the House of Thy Father. She gave with all she had her entire life in so many ways, to those she loved and to those she

didn't even know. ...And she gave "from her heart". She never stopped giving although oftentimes, the recipients were ungrateful and

unappreciative. Giving from the heart however, can never be wrong. Only within "how it's received" can error be preempted.

My hero is my Mom, plain and simple. There is no one else in my life or ever could be in my life that could even come close to my

beloved Mother! She was my best friend. She was someone I knew I could always confide in, knowing my thoughts, feelings, concerns,

etc., would be kept private between the two of us only.

True confidentiality is a very difficult trait to find in others for most never keep private discussions "totally" private and confidential.

Most have to repeat what was discussed with another person, even if it's say, just with their significant other, a person they trust. Once it

is passed on to another, however, it is then on its way to be repeated to yet another "trusted" individual and then another "trusted" person,

until the initial conversation becomes no longer "private and confidential". When I give a person my word that the conversation will remain

just between the two of us, it then "remains just between the two of us" and so, the discussion goes NO further with only ONE exception

and this is: if I feel the person's life or well being could be in jeopardy, and even then, I tread very carefully and respectfully with whatever I

know. I will not volunteer anything more than I deem necessary for the person's safety and well being to be maintained.

My beautiful daughter, a lovely young lady, a service woman for our country, and of whom I am so very proud for many reasons.

Yes, I'm proud because she is my daughter, but I'm proud of the person she has become. She has a backbone, which means she's not

afraid to stand up against an injustice against another. She doesn't go along with the program just for the sake to appease others or just

because others are. She thinks for herself and does not allow others to do her thinking or the forming of her opinions for her. She stands

up for what she believes in. She doesn't allow others to walk all over her either, a lesson her mother definitely needs to learn!

Being a mother is the most important aspect about my life. My daughter was not a gift to me, but rather I was given the ultimate and

most precious privilege of being responsible for the life of another, my daughter, to try and fulfill this responsibility to the best of my ability.

Being a good parent involves sacrifices and placing another's life, happiness, and well being before one's own, but the rewards are

immeasurable and absolutely priceless. It is not an easy task or even just one, but rather multifaceted, multi-complicated, always ongoing,

24-7 for the rest of one's life. Although as parents, we are irreplaceable as teachers, guides, and as "example setters", we are also

learners, both because of our children and from our children.

Perfection is not required nor is it reasonable to expect of oneself as a parent or with most anything about ourselves, for as we are all

"works in progress", and it's a process that is lifelong. As with any "work in progress", there are mistakes to be made. Mistakes teach us

and remind us that we are not infallible. They keep us humble and keep arrogance at bay. We tend to learn more from our mistakes than

we do from our achievements, but it is our achievements that promote healthy levels of self worth, which we all need to cultivate good self

esteem, which in turn provides us with the confidence to push us forward, more and better prepared to face what lies ahead, whether the

sailing is smooth or if the seas become rough and stormy.

I am also blessed being born gifted as and destined to be a creative person. Not only was my mother inventive, creative, and

resourceful, providing a nurturing environment conducive for encouragement of creativity, but I began drawing just as soon as I could hold a

pencil and not just doodles, but attempts to draw subjects in my environment, like animals we had, flowers in the garden, just to mention

a couple. I also liked to put various objects together to build or create something new. When I began school, my teachers were impressed

with my artistic abilities, my art teacher especially.

(CHILDHOOD)

I almost died as an infant from complications brought on by pneumonia. My doctor even had all but given up, but my mother refused to

and I do believe I survived because of her sheer will and faith. Because of all the medication I had to take, I was left with a heart condition,

which prevented me from doing a lot of activities other kids took part in. This placed me in the position of being odd, not fitting in, and a

prime candidate for bullying, mockery, and ridicule.

Unfortunately for me, however, it was not only the children I went to school with whom I had to endure emotional torment because of, but

there were two teachers who used me as their source of pleasure, to tease and taunt me. One of these teachers in particular would tell me

I was just a retard because I couldn't play like the other kids could, and this just incited the other children to pick on and bully me more.

His name was Mr. Hughes.

The other teacher, every chance he got, he singled me out, embarrassing me and he would sit at his desk and literally stare at me. He

would also deliberately find any little thing to use as a reprimand to embarrass me in front of the class, but meanwhile, others doing the

same were not. One student even called him on his behaviour, when he deliberately tried to provoke me, when I had just gotten the news

about losing a family member whom I loved very much. Another time just after my horse had been killed, he followed me all over the

school, and when I tried to avoid him, he interrupted the class I was in, and made an announcement in front of the class that I was to

report to the office, making it appear to everyone like I had done something wrong, which I had not.

To grasp this situation better, one has to know the type of kid I was. I didn't like to be singled out nor to be the center of attention in any

way, shape, or form. I felt I was just an ugly misfit, and I felt embarrassed and ashamed to stand up in front of the class or anyone, for I

was pretty much made to believe that I was nothing more than an ugly, worthless being on almost a daily basis AND not only at school,

but also at home by my stepfather, whom also belittled me continually, as he also loved to swat me on a daily basis.

As if this wasn't enough, I had an older sibling who molested me, and threatened me with, if I told anyone, he would get me in trouble so

my stepfather would then beat my behind with his belt, which he loved ripping off to use on us kids. I never told my mother about the

molesting, because I didn't think she deserved to feel awful about something that was not her fault, but knowing her as I do, she would

have found a way to blame herself.

If it wasn't for the fact that I always knew and felt my mother was always in my corner, I can honestly say, I do not know how or even if I

would have survived it all, because it was quite difficult to feel like I had a safe haven anywhere. But my mother encouraged me. She told

me I was special, my life had been spared for a reason, and that I was like her. It is only as I've lived my life, year by year, have I come to

know and realise more and more, just what my mother meant by saying I am like her. There is no greater compliment I could ever receive

than to be told that I am like my mother.

My mother was gifted. She could see or sense things before they happened. She could spot a "fake" type person a mile away and she

could not be fooled. She was a loved and cherished person by many for she always thought of everyone and could and would empathise

with their troubles or grief, always genuinely concerned. My Mom was about the most REAL person there ever could be. She wasn't a

braggart or a boaster, but modest and an exemplary lady at all times. She didn't like being placed in the spotlight nor did she like having

her picture taken. She was a private person, devoted to her family, especially her children, and she kept herself busy giving to and doing

stuff for others, especially those she loved, and she didn't waste her time being nosy or minding the business of others.

Unfortunately, there were people who resented her, but the only people who did were those that were jealous of her. She was a petite lady,

with long, brunette hair with natural auburn highlights, blue eyes, and a hearty laugh. She had a wonderful sense of humour and always a

positive outlook, no matter how tough her life was and her life was never easy. Everything she did, she did well, superbly, and those who

were jealous of her, would use her assets to ridicule her. But she was strong with a will that wouldn't quit nor would she allow it to and she

held her head high, which irritated her rivals even more. It is the strength she had, her perseverance and will power she demonstrated, that

I always try to borrow from, utilise, when I am faced with adversity and often the same type of jealous people, she rose above so master-

fully.

I try to love unconditionally, cultivating forgiveness and understanding, which is not easy to do, especially if you've been hurt

tremendously and/or tread upon by a person being the recipient of your love and trust, whether they be a friend, family member, or a sig-

nificant other. I have spent much of my life involved with animals/pets, sharing my life with them, and helping those that have been abused,

neglected, abandoned, etc. and their "unconditional love and total acceptance" still amazes me, as it also instills just how much more I

need to cultivate the same within myself.

The Golden Rule: "Treat others as oneself would like to be treated" is a rule of thumb I try to adhere to, although I have been known

to fall short of this goal many times, especially if I am under the very strong impression that I have been placed "under the gun" unjustly. I

WILL do whatever I feel necessary to defend myself and my integrity. As a rule, I am very easy going, will shrug off much wrongfully thrown

in my direction, but if such mounts to the point of being unacceptable any longer, others can expect nothing less than to find out just how

far I will go to defend and protect myself, my reputation, my integrity. Therefore, some people become quite flustered and taken aback,

when I unleash my defense mechanisms, especially because I am usually quite tolerant otherwise.

One of the lessons I've had to learn in life is, some people aren't happy unless they are targeting another, and the targets they single out,

are usually people they envy for one reason or another or several. The target often represents a part or parts of themselves they feel is/are

lacking within themselves. By undermining the same in the targeted person, they provide themselves with a false pretense of feeling

superior to the targeted person. The method of undermining often incorporates "projection", which is the taking of one's own less than

desirable traits one finds revolting within themselves and then associating these traits with the targeted person and thus, in the one's mind,

making the recipient selected (targeted person) the bearer or owner of, instead of themselves, and falsely believing they themselves have

been cleansed of any unacceptability.

A healthy minded individual would take a different approach or course of action. Instead of resenting good traits and characteristics in

another and trying to undermine them, they would see them as traits to cultivate better within themselves. Healthy minded people see and

welcome the positiveness in others as inspirational to try to better themselves with, not as an agenda to be defeated or undermined. A

healthy mind is aware that no one is perfect, including oneself and so, it looks within oneself and recognises both the pluses and the

minuses; aims to maintain the pluses in good standing, while working with the minuses to make improvements.

About friends: I cherish my friends. If a person is my friend, they are then important to me and they will always be, as long as they

remain my friend. I will defend and support my friends to the nines. Even if our lives become busy with other distractions, causing a lack of

communication for a time, they don't become less significant to me nor do I forget about them. As far as choosing my friends, I can't say

that I actually do, for I am open to meeting people, potential friends, and a stranger can be a "friend I have yet to meet". My many friends

have a wide array of backgrounds including cultural, occupational, etc., and of both the male and female genders and of all ages. Social

statuses and the opinions of others in regards to a person, play no role in my decision whether a person becomes my friend or not.

As far as a special person in my life: My heart has ALL the say in this regard. As with my friendships, the same pretty much applies,

except I keep my heart well guarded, because my heart doesn't seem to know what is best for it or should I say, whom is best to let in

and whom should never be allowed in. My heart has been stomped on and severely wounded many times because of this. As with most

everything else I commit myself to, I give love my all; with all that I have, with all that I am. I don't do anything I'm involved with half way. It's

either "all" or "nothing" and if I feel whatever it may be or whomever is worth my time, then it/they is/are worth my best effort. Anything less

is unacceptable "to me".

It is not what we acquire in life that counts. It is what we give and contribute for the

betterment of others, that does. I do not want to be remembered for what I have, but rather for what I have 'given'.

The best things in life cannot be bought at any price and real success or worth should not be measured in monetary value, but rather by

what one holds within their heart. A heart that is compassionate, understanding, giving, and forgiving is invaluable.

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